One Autistic Person’s Journey from Kindergarten to Secondary School
If you’ve met one autistic person, remember that you’ve met just that one person! The autism spectrum is called a spectrum for a reason.
We are a small family from Zagreb – Matej, mom, and dad – and this is the story of the mother of a seventeen-year-old autistic boy, on his journey from kindergarten to secondary school.
Our story in numbers – we changed 4 kindergartens, deferred enrollment in primary school twice, had about a dozen conversations at 4 primary schools before we chose the one that accepted Matej, and spent two years researching vocational secondary schools across Croatia before deciding on Samobor Vocational Secondary School – HVAC and Mechanical Installations Fitter.
I deliberately mentioned 4 kindergartens, because those changes taught me how prepared, informed, and aware of our child’s real capabilities we as parents need to be, because in our case there was no support from the system, and none of the experts we met seriously looked at everything Matej could do — everyone just focused on what he couldn’t.
That’s exactly why I believe the two enrollment deferrals were the right thing for our family — they gave us time to visit all the schools we were interested in, talk to the professional services several times, and make the decision calmly. One of our prerequisites in choosing a primary school was smaller classes, and the school we chose had that – 2 classes per generation with 15/16 students each. A wonderful, experienced teacher greatly helped individualize the school material, and what helped most was that the aide who had been with Matej for two years in kindergarten continued with him through the first three years of primary school.
The biggest change in Matej’s primary education happened with the transition from 6th to 7th grade — puberty hit, and the social side of things changed a great deal. Matej was also becoming increasingly aware of his own differences, so we, as parents, decided to request an adapted school program to ease at least part of the material and the teachers’ expectations.
By the time it came to enrolling in secondary school, we knew Matej was a visual type who would rather do something than sit and learn from a book – he’s someone who likes being active (he says so himself, he likes helping) and needs to know the purpose behind what he’s doing. All of that pointed us toward a vocational occupation, but what we were very afraid of, and what I’m still afraid of as a parent, is peer bullying. Because he struggles to understand social relationships and rules, Matej can sometimes act or say things that other teenagers find unacceptable, so as part of our research into secondary schools we also asked various parents about that aspect.
We researched every vocational school in Croatia, because family circumstances meant we could move to another city at any time. Samobor, known as a town of craftsmen, made our shortlist, and after talking with the school’s professional service and with various teachers at the school’s Open Day, we concluded that it met our requirements and was genuinely open to children’s differences. We want Matej to learn a trade in secondary school so that, with the right support, he can work and contribute to society rather than be a burden on it.
So when I heard about the Struka association’s project – Metautism – and specifically the message Mr. Habek gave in an interview for In-portal, that autistic people should be given a chance, I contacted him right away and asked him to include Matej in the project.
At the project presentation at the Zagreb Autism Association, using extended reality technology (VR goggles), Matej was able to try welding in safe conditions, without fear of making a mistake. That’s exactly what helps him as an autistic person — a safe environment, no fear of failure, the chance to try something several times until he fully understands how it works, so he can then do it on his own. What he also found very interesting were what we call at home the “little films” – 15 occupations in the form of 360° videos, where he could clearly see and experience what a particular job involves (noise, light, number of people, the type of materials used, and so on)
When certain project activities were carried out at the Faculty of Education and Rehabilitation Sciences in Zagreb, Matej took part in those as well. He was thrilled when, using the VR goggles, he put out a fire in a hallway — he had to know exactly how and in what way to use a fire extinguisher. This project is truly refreshing, because I think it brings a new approach toward autistic people — instead of separating them from society, it provides tools for including them in it. The technology that surrounds us, and that keeps advancing every day, can, in an appropriate way, help the autistic population both in choosing an occupation and in the step-by-step learning of a particular trade or parts of technological processes.